Chad and Catherine's Adventures in London

Daddy is home

About two weeks ago and out of no where, William looked up at me and said "I miss Daddy."  I'd never heard him verbalize that type of emotion before, but there was no turning back!  He then started talking about missing Daddy daily, making wishes in the water fountain outside for "Daddy to come from London" ... unprompted!

So everyone was super excited when we went to pick Chad up from the airport in Charlotte this past Saturday.  His flight was delayed three hours and he got off the plane as sick as a dog, but he was home. And I couldn't appreciate him more.  It IS possible to keep things together as a single Mom, particularly with Renata around.  But it ain't easy, especially when starting a new job and trying to finish an international relocation.  

This morning, when I told William I was leaving for work, he looked at Chad and said "Daddy stay home" in a very declarative manner - - and then went about his business.  Last week, he would start about five minutes after waking up and repeat "Mama no go to work" about every 5-10 minutes until I walked out the door.... and then about every two days there were tears and crying involved.  The reality is, William is used to a lot of love, and there has been a Daddy deficit over the past six weeks.  

Chad is rapidly making up for lost time and William is loving every minute!  And I'm pretty happy to have my husband home as well.  One more step back to our new normal.  

Social Life

PInch me, I think I have a social life again.

Those who know me well probably doubted all my comments about having a difficult time making friends in London.  I swear, it was true.  We do have a small handful of people with whom we were close, but I would say we really went three years with not having much of a social life.  Some of it due to the fact we were new parents.  Some due to traveling lots - for work as well as for pleasure.  Some just because we stayed a little insular and didn't force ourselves to make the effort.

But after this weekend, I feel like I am starting to have a social life once again.  It started on Thursday night where I attended a Christmas Ornament exchange at my friend Julie Garrison's house.  Julie and I have known each other since college, and I was delighted to see two other college friends at the party as well - Amy Kimbro and Natalie Scott.

Friday Sarah Dalena came into town and I popped in to meet her, her two sisters Anna and Maria, their husbands - all at a friend's birthday party at 42nd Street Oyster Bar.  I'd met Tracy Anderson (the birthday girl) once before and felt like I knew her even better through all the great photos that Anna regularly shares of their adventures.  Sarah and I slipped away to 518 West for a dinner of catching up - - where we bumped into yet another friend from college - Anita Pinther.  Saturday morning, Anna, Maria, Sarah and I took a two hour yoga class at Blue Lotus and then hit the Umstead Spa for massages. 

Sunday, William and I had a wonderful waffle brunch at my friend Allison McFadden's house where we finally got a chance to meet her beautiful, almost-two-year-old son, Ronan.  Allison and I were in business school together and she and her husband Rueben were in Dublin, Ireland for two years - overlapping while Chad and I were in London.  We took the boys to a park just blocks from her house and let them romp around on the playground and in the leaves.  

And then we headed back to North Hills to meet my high school friends Sarah and Jason Colby and one of their sons - Devan.  They were headed back to Knoxville, TN from a weekend trip to Greenville, NC - - and luckily for us they stopped through for a great catch-up lunch.  It was so wonderful to see them!

A packed weekend full of what I love most - FRIENDS!  This was one of the top reasons we wanted to move "home" and it is so freaking fabulous!

 

2 years... 10 months

William - I had a special moment with you this week.  I came home from work early so that Renata could go to get her social security card.  You were having a hard time getting to sleep for your nap (as you've been resisting sleep like crazy lately).  I went in upon request to "cuddle Mama".  You tossed and turned and then stretched across me... before falling to sleep almost instantly.  I'd counted on having a solid two hours at home to get some things done while you slept.  Instead, I was pinned underneath you watching you breath and sleep peacefully.  It took me back to the days where I was breastfeeding you and you'd pass out after a good feed.  At the time, I always was a little frustrated as there seemed to be so many things I needed to get done.  On this day, I simply relaxed and realized how special it was to have this opportunity with you once again.  

You only slept for 45 minutes, and I spent the time thing about how much you've grown up over the past few months. In September - when we moved into temporary housing in London - you started sleeping in a "big boy bed".  We'd moved your crib in, but one day you simply wanted to take your nap in the double bed in the same room.  We put about 10 pillows out around the bed, and of course you never fell out (but we worried every night for a week that you would).  Within just a week, you were sleeping soundly in that bed for both your nap and at night.  You are also completely toilet trained, probably as of October.  In our second temporary house in South Kensington you had probably two accidents a week at night, but in the month we've been in Raleigh, I can think of only two total times.  

Your vocabulary has exploded and you constantly make me laugh at all the funny things that you pick up and say.  "William needs just a little bit more" or "That sounds gooooood!" or today when having lunch with some friends you said "Mama, stop talking!" so that you could ask for more food.  Yesterday you were trying to get my attention and made a "pssst, psst" sound.  Your Daddy and I have used that since you were born to get your attention, or give you hints on where to find us during games of hide and seek.  And you used it on me for the very first time.  Renata speaks to you in Spanish, and although you still respond in English, you know exactly what she is saying.  And you do throw in words here and there.. numbers, colors or even a "it's FRIO" when your milk is too cold.

Your tantrums seem to be fewer in number, but the constant negotiation never stops.  "Mama, play train tracks, four minutes" or when I tell you one book before bed, you always ask for three... sometimes five.  Everyone that sees you around North Hills is totally wowed by your ability to ride your scooter (hate to tell you - but you were a pretty average scooter rider in London - but you are a star here in Raleigh where not all kids have one and use it to get around daily!).  I love watching you push long strides and lean one way or another to take sharp corners with grace. Your favorite color is purple, and you about lost your mind our last week in London when after weeks of looking, you finally found a purple cab to take a ride in.  

Lately, we talk a lot about dreams and make up stories about what Minnie, Woof-Woof and Jack-Bear dream about each night.  Your favorite is that you get on a purple airplane with the three of them (no Mama, no Daddy) and go to Thailand, packing your Owl backpack with our bathing suit, sunglasses and a towel, and find a beach with white sand, turquoise water and massages. You love trains, fire engines, outdoor Christmas lights, puzzles, putting anything in order, spanish books and helping make pancakes on weekend mornings.  You are a very sweet and loving boy, who still loves to cuddle and gives amazing tight squeeze hugs.  Lately, you hate going to bed and having your hair washed, and I'm keeping my fingers crossed this is just a stage.

Just today, I took you to see your very first movie - Happy Feet 2.  You sat in my lap for the first hour, dancing, clapping and laughing out loud... sometimes jumping with your heart racing when it got a little scary. You loved the popcorn and were very upset when you figured out we actually had to leave the theater after the movie was over.  

You are growing up incredibly fast, and I'm trying so very hard to appreciate and cherish every day that passes.  I love you more each day. 

Still moving

For the most part, I'm pretty relaxed about moving.  Given we've done it quite a bit, I'm used to the different components and pieces that have to come together and be accomplished.  But some days really throw me over the edge.

Yesterday it was the time I spent trying to extend my rental car by three weeks.  We still haven't found a car to purhase and I have more coverage through work.  Therefore I called Hertz to ask to extend the contract. Seems like they'd make it easy given the amount of additional money they make in the process.  But no.

The credit card they had on file was my old Intuit card and thus the pre-approval needed to extend the reservation was declined.  Simple, I'll just give them another card, right?  No, they can't take credit cards over the phone.  Are you kidding me?  Is this 1981?  I even asked to speak with a manager (who said no) as well as was transfered to the local Raleigh airport facility (who said no).  Therefore I got in the car and drove all the way back to the airport to make the change.

But when I got there, more problems.  We had to close out the current contract and open a new one.  When we did that, the car I wanted to keep (car seats, stroller in trunk, other items in it,etc.) flagged up for maintenance.  So we had to switch cars.  Then when trying to process the new contract through on my credit card, Bank of America flagged it and blocked the processing until we got on the phone with the fraud department. 

An hour and a half later, I was back at my desk at work.  Fuming.  Something that seems like it should take five minutes takes a huge chunk out of your day.  Deep breathing, deep breathing.

 

Skinny Scoop

One of my favorite websites is Skinny Scoop.  I was turned onto this site by my friend Jen Birk who somehow knows the founders through her Mom's network in the San Francisco Bay area.  I love the style and tone of the writers as they don't just talk about kids, but all the stuff in a woman-my-age's life.  This post today almost made me snort coffee out my nose:

Holy Holiday, Batgirls! December starts tomorrow.  Christmas carols playing in the mall, santas everywhere waiting to scare your children, Menorah candles & dreidels dusted off, tree up in the family room (boxes of decorating shrapnel still all over the floor), outdoor lights up and possibly even working, latke ingredients ready to go.

December starts tomorrow. For me, that means there are approximately 24 days left until my husband asks “what should we get the kids for Christmas?”  or “did we get something for my parents?”

And there are approximately infinity days left until he asks about what we are getting for the cousins, the kids’ teachers, family kris kringle exchange, our housekeeper, carpoolmates, babysitter, neighbors, party hostesses, etc.  For him, it’s just part of that Christmas magic that this ALL GETS DONE (YES, I’M YELLING). 

Yay for the holidays!

Possibly you received a few emails about black Friday or cyber Monday, from every single site you have ever bought something from.  Possibly you have received some emails that tout great “gift guides.”

I found a list today from the “experts” at gifts.com, and among the top items for women in the 30+ category (but not seniors) is a “personalized stuffed animal for her” where you upload a picture and they make a stuffed animal that looks like you. A stuffed you. That costs nearly $80.  Pat, I know you will think this is funny, but don’t do it.

Here’s a roundup of great gift ideas that have been gathered from around the web by women just like you.  I can’t guarantee that you’ll find the perfect gift here, but it’s a cut through the crap, no need to sift through, cheat sheet of realistic gifts in several verticals.  Stocking stuffers for the crafty, gifts that give back, gifts for teachers, gifts for tech moms.

And she goes on to give a great gift guide for all those people on your list.  My favorite was the "Art of Manliness" website list - perfect gift ideas for those hard to buy for me - like the "Tactial Tomahawk" - something certainly every urban man needs. Enjoy!

http://www.skinnyscoop.com/blog/2011/11/30/what-women-want-skinnyscoop-readers-top-gift-picks/

 

Giving Thanks

We have so much to be thankful for, and this past weekend we were lucky enough to celebrate with the reason at the top of my personal list - family and friends.

We spent Thanksgiving in Mt. Airy with the Harrell's where we cooked, caught up and ate ourselves silly.  William really enjoyed the quality time with his cousins, Nana and Poppy including trips around the neighborhood on the four wheeler, playing in the massive piles of leaves Poppy was blowing in the yard, riding on the tractor and playing with Hayden and Logan.  I think Renata enjoyed the fun as well including taking part in the traditional American Thanksgiving activities.  

The kids playing games with Renata

William and Hayden reading together

The family together for Thanksgiving (Melody, Mike and Aunt Jeannie took the bar!)

A trip to Opie's Candy shop on main street with Nana

Melody offered to keep William at her house an extra night so that Chad and I could have some quality time to ourselves on Friday and Saturday.  I almost felt strange as we've really never had that type of unexpected luxury before - ah, the joys of being home close to family.

Chad and I had a dinner and movie date night and then spent almost all day Saturday in Chapel Hill with friends at the UNC vs Duke football game.  I hadn't been to a game in four years and it had been longer since I'd actually walked on campus.  It was so very wonderful to see everyone and catch up together.

 

I'm so very thankful.

Normalizing

Things are starting to feel normal around here again.  That is the new normal - what ever that is evolving into!  Renata arrived on Friday after three days of training and sight seeing in New York City.  She was in a class of 16 Au Pairs that promptly scattered to different families around the country.  Chad arrived on Saturday and since that time, "Daddy" has to do everything... "strap me in!", "fix my breakfast", 'play train tracks".  I have to say, it's actually a nice break.  Nothing like taking a long hot shower and actually have personal time to get dressed without crying or constant tugging to do something else!  I love having quality time with William, but it is also great to have some other folks in the house that he is just as attached to.

It's also been fun to observe America through Chad's eyes.  He's having almost exactly the same reactions that I had... just two weeks delayed.

• Look, Chick-fil-A!
• Gosh, everyone here wears college team t-shirts, sweatshirt and baseball caps.  I mean everyone.
• Is this a linen closet?  Look how wide these halls are.  Can you believe the size of the closet in here?
• Wow, people are SO friendly.  They just talk to you when you are standing in line.  It's almost a strange feeling to have people be so nice to you.
• Can you believe the size of this orange juice jug?  I wonder how long it's been since I've seen a gallon of milk.  Portion sizes here are crazy large.
• Where is a good Bojangles when you need one?
• Wow, back to the land of 20% tipping.  Kind of like the rate being set at 10-12% and included in your bill. 

I've found that some of the things that drive me nuts about America I also missed terribly.  I hate fast food, but get a total pleasure out of Chick-fil-A and Chipotle.  Big box retail stores seem so foreign, but it sure is nice to go into one place and be able to find a HUGE selection of EVERYTHING you could possibly need in one place.  Portion sizes are out of control, but it is great to have left overs you can eat for lunch the following day.  I miss the crazy, sleek European fashion scene, but also love being able to go out in more casual attire if I want to and not feel bad about it all.  Mixed emotions?

 

 

 

 

Being "home"

Over a week has passed since we landed in North Carolina.  Needless to say, between getting settled in temporary housing, taking care of William, starting a new job and continuing to keep our overall relocation on track, things have been a little too busy to blog regularly.  But we are doing well, primarily thanks to the help of Nana and Grandmama who have both come to Raleigh to take care of William while I started working.  

There are many adjustments.  The biggest one is driving.  I hate it... really hate it.  Although we are living in an apartment in North Hills - a fantastic new planned community with lots of shops, restaurants, markets within walking distance - you still have to drive practically everywhere.  And it feels like I'm spending SO much time in the car.  My rental has an interesting feature -a clock that started running when I rented it and only keeps time when I'm driving.  After one week, it read nine hours and thirty six minutes.  Granted, two hours of that was driving back and forth to Greensboro for an overnight at Sarah's house and Ruby Deakins's birthday party.  But still.  That much time sitting on my butt in a car?  In one week?

My commute is surprisingly short - only about 15 or 20 minutes one way.  I try to remind myself that I still did a lot of sitting on my commute each day in London as I was on the train between 25 and 40 minutes each way.  But it felt so different for some reason.  Perhaps because I had to walk to and from the station.  Or because on a train you can read, work on your laptop or phone, eat breakfast.  Somehow it felt like although long, my commute was actually better for me.

For lunch on Tuesday of this week, I ventured out of the building to find the Whole Foods grocery store. I looked it up on Google Maps and discovered it was only 1.2 miles away.  But that didn't feel quite walkable, so I drove.  It took me 12 minutes to get there and 14 minutes to get back to the office.  Both times, I had to sit through two cycles of each red light I went through.  AARRRGHH!  I can walk a brisk mile in about 15-17 minutes so next time I'll think about leaving the car in the lot.

Another funny observation is the high level of attention William gets riding his scooter around the North Hills area.  In London, almost every kid his age had a scooter.  After all, when you walk everywhere as adults, a scooter for your kid is one of the fastest options for bringing them along.  It's almost like people here haven't really seen kids on scooters, or maybe just not ones as young as William - - particularly taking corners and maneuvering like he can.  It's pure entertainment!

William is mixed on riding in cars.  He thinks getting out in them is fun and even asks randomly to go for rides.  When driving, we talk a lot about the different names of all the cars around us... Odyssey, Kia, Highlander, Fiesta, Rover.  He HATES the turn signal.  If we are sitting at a light too long and I've got one on, he asks over and over to turn the "green light off".  And his span of patience sitting for longer rides is really, really low.  While driving home from Chapel Hill on Sunday night, he told me 36 times that he wanted to "get home and get out".  Given he also hates the radio, I had to start counting just so I wouldn't loose my mind.

Now a positive is that I don't have to sit next to any really stinky people on my regular daily outings.  The week before we left London, I literally got off the tube a stop earlier and walked a longer distance home just to get away from someone on the train.  Yuck.  A nice clean and quiet car does have that as an advantage.

But overall, I really miss my public transportation.  I miss fresh air and walking every day to get where I am going. Driving is my biggest adjustment.

 

So long, farewell

Departure from London was smooth.  We had a taxi to the airport, arrived early, and got an upgrade to business class with points that I’ve racked up over my travels.  We even had time to have a little snack with Daddy before hugs and kisses goodbye and heading through security.  We even had time to pick up a Paddington Bear for William in the Harrod’s gift shop in Terminal 3.  The pilots were also super friendly, inviting William up before take off to have his photo flying the plane.

Although he didn’t nap on the nine-hour flight, William was very well behaved.  This made me happy, particularly given we were seated next to one of my very favorite actors, Mr. Colin Firth.   I actually probably wouldn’t have even noticed him but the flight attendants were overly talkative and friendly… and I heard one address him by “Mr. Firth”.  He was so gracious and kind to everyone who approached him during the flight. 

We were "introduced" after William decided and announced that he no longer wanted his seat.  Instead he wanted Colin’s seat and they should switch.  Needless to say, that didn’t happen, but we did have a nice conversation about his first born - also named William - who is now 21 years old, the difficulties of getting dual citizenship and how much he was enjoying Wilmington where he was currently working.  He had been home in London only for two days to see his wife and younger two sons because it had been a full month since he'd seen them last.  I thought my brief Hugh Grant sighting in Marylebone was exciting.  This really topped it.  I'm a fan for life.

The sight of my Mom and our long-time family friends Barbara and David Brent waiting in RDU airport was fantastic, particularly given I was hauling six pieces of very full luggage and an over tired two year old.   We called Chad to let him know we arrived and drove safely to our new temporary housing in North Hills… and then collapsed by 7:30.

 

 

 

Day 1 - Remember, remember

"Remember, remember the Fifth of November, the Gunpowder Treason and Plot,
I see no reason, why the Gunpowder Treason, should ever be forgot"

"Guy Fawkes, Guy Fawkes, t'was his intent, to blow up the King and Parli'ment,
three-score barrels of powder below, to prove old England's overthrow"

"By God's providence he was catch'd, with a dark lantern and burning match,
holla boys, holla boys, let the bells ring, holloa boys, holloa boys, God save the King!"

The 5^th of November is Guy Fawkes Day in London, celebrated universally with bonfires and firework displays in celebration.  I still don’t get why they celebrate the failure of a guy who tried to blow up Parliament, but I love the quirkiness of it all.  In our last full day, we spent half of the day doing what we normally do on any Saturday morning – swim classes, a walk through the market, a few errands.  And not so usual – a lot of packing.

After naptime, we got up, had dinner and headed south to Battersea Park.  Although it really isn’t that far away, due to the traffic and hordes of people piling into the park, it took us a while to taxi and walk down.  One of the highlights was getting to walk over the Albert Bridge, which I think is one of the loveliest bridges across the Thames London.  We piled into Battersea, Chad grumbling a bit about having to pay 10 GBP to see fireworks (“as if we’ve ever had to pay to see fireworks in the US!”). 

Once inside, we realized we were in the company of tens of thousands of other Londoners.  There was a HUGE bonfire that captivated William, lots of carnival food and beer tents, and then a wonderful firework display.  I don’t know that I’ve ever seen one that was actually choreographed in time with music, particularly one of the best fire-themed mixes I’ve heard ever – from the “Burn baby burn – disco inferno” to “It’s Getting Hot in Here” to "Burning Ring of Fire" and a slew of songs with a British flavor including Adele’s latest “Set Fire to the Rain”.  The display was beautiful – Chad said the only one better was one we’d seen on the steps of the Capital for the fourth of July in Washington DC.

So we will now officially say that we went out with a bang – and we will always remember, remember our last three years and three months in this wonderful city and country…. And our last night on the 5^th of November.